5. A reboot, for lack of a less corporate term

I don't know what I'm doing on Substack and it rules

I began this Substack as a way to document a fantastic trip to Antarctica. I can’t say I got tired of writing about Antarctica because that’s a place I’ll never tire of writing about, or visiting. I’d go back tomorrow if I could. No, I think I stopped writing about Antarctica because words stopped conveying what I wanted them to convey. I stopped writing about the place because it started to feel mannered and “writerly,” and that’s a big problem — it tells me that my education is kicking in, and that I am, once more, attempting to demonstrate some sort of intelligence. These are all bad signs because they are ego-driven and unnatural, and good writing is the antithesis of ego, and not coincidentally, being around Antarctica is the most ego-suppressive experience I’ll ever have. The form of “writing about Antarctica” became opposite of the experience of going there itself, so I think my creative mind stopped as a form of protest.

Now I’ve got this thing re-titled Slow Burning, a title because it’s insider short-hand for a style of mystery, and because I think it describes art well — a constant, quiet discipline. No bright lights. No dramatic fireballs. Just work.

I go to work at 500am, I make bread, I come home and sometime in the afternoon, I resume writing. Day in and day out.

Sometime soon, I hope to publish an excerpt or excerpts of my work-in-progress novel. Why not? What’s to lose? The work contains every possible trigger warning; they’re mean and angry and deal with Judaism in ways you’ve probably never seen and most likely don’t want to see. Oh well. None of those are issues for me, the writer. For a reader, maybe they are problematic. I’m not sure what’s the point of fiction (or nonfiction, for that matter) if it isn’t transgressive in some way(s.)

I’d like to do some literary criticism here. I have an idea for a series of posts diving into the history and importance of crime as a genre . I’ve spent eight years researching espionage and spy fiction; I could post about what I’ve found, I could review books I think are essential to understanding a world-in-chaos.

I’d like to post right-off-my-phone nature photos sometimes. I’ll keep up with the travel writing, when I travel. Maybe I’ll write about making bread (bagels, in my case) and what it’s like working in a bakery. I’d like to even post some audio. I’d like to talk about the visual arts. I have a bunch of people I would love to interview: colleagues of mine who are fascinating creatives, cousins of mine who are genuinely brilliant artists, other writers, people I just found here on Substack but whose work I really want to spread into the world…

Anything that contributes to a slow, consistent growth as a human being — that’s what I’ll use this space to explore.

I’m really not sure how often I’ll post — but that’s the point. I have no plan. I do not want a plan. I want to let Substack surprise me and hopefully my writing “style” conveys interesting clarity and then just gets out of the way…

Thanks for hanging with me and let’s see what happens.

-A